If i were a REAL boy.

I've been listening to this music, over and over again. What makes it even more meaningful to me, was this part...

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts.
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

BECAUSE...

Cause I know that she’d been faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

and it's so true. I've been in love with a man for almost to a fruitful three years. And we know how much we've been through....
And sometimes, I feel so frustrated that we both always fall into a complicated situation and sometimes i always have this thought, if we could ever switch our sex(s), i believe i can treat my girl even better than what i am recieving now ( im not trying to say, that i am not appreciating everything that he has done for me throughout these years BUT Im just trying to tell everybody that i could understand my girlfriend so much better than other boyfriends because i can make her HAPPY ALL THE TIME.24 hour, without feeling insecure or hurt in a way or another.) and that girl will be my beloved, SUFRIZAL. :D or maybe Michelle? you want? HAHAHA..

If I were a boy

Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me.

[Chorus]
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I could turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d been faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

(Chorus)

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

(Chorus)

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
Yeah you don’t understand
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you’re just a boy

what pissed me of is that, he AWLAYS use the words, "maybe", "InsyaAllah", "hope so", "i'll see first"
he can never decide things perfectly for me, Always in between plannings, there's double thoughts.why why why? i wonder why.
aint im not the one whom you will prioritise most?
because i believe, i always prioritse you before anything
pissed-

i always feel neglected.YES I FEEL THAT WAY.

EVERYTIME.

:,(

I HOPE HE CHANGED FOR BETTER. FOR US, FOR ME and most importantly for this relationship.

ps:i love you, suf.